Rant

Dear popular media,
Thanks for telling me everything I need to know about all of the important things in life. Thank you Seventeen, for propagating a Healthy body image at under 100 pounds and showing me how to make my body super sexy so guys will like me. Also, those "dressing for your body shape" tips? They totally make me feel better about myself! I like how I should conform to one specific body type and shape in order to look attractive. Thank you Cosmo, for teaching teenagers sex tips that could put them in the hospital, and women that pleasing the man in their life is the most important thing. It's also super cool how you urge us to have hot, exciting sex but then make women feel bad about having too many partners. Thank you Twilight for showing me how to be completely dependent on a guy for both my happiness and my psychological well-being. You also gave me a lot of neat ways to help me deal with my emotions! Not expressing them, shutting down, never talking to people, and engaging in dangerous behaviors are all things I'm going to try the next time I'm upset.
Sincerely, well-informed. (right?)

Stellar

School has started and it makes me awfully sad. :( It seems like there's no time for anything productive anymore! Please enjoy some pictures I had floating around on my desktop.









I don't remember where I found them, sorry! The first one is my favorite, because it's so floaty and ethereal. The other two are just pretty and I kind of wish I had a reason to wear them somewhere.
I haven't posted in ages, but I'm hoping to start again.

You Part the Waters

Here are the not-terribly-blurry pictures from the stellar clothes at the museum I visited in Wisconsin. I can't promise that the quality is perfect, as it was very dimly lit except right on the displays behind the glass panels, but here it is!

This last little picture was actually taken at the "general store" at the museum but I liked it an awful lot.

I realize this post isn't that interesting unless you like looking at blurry pics of old clothes. But I thought I'd share anyways. :) Anyways, Meghan and I had tea a while back while wearing ridiculous clothes. I didn't get a picture then, but I'll recreate it because it was pretty nice.

More sometime later!

Pretty Much Everything Is Awesome

Wisconsin is awesome. Canada is awesome. Life is awesome. Most imp
ortantly, I'M awesome (as if you needed told).

Let me force you to look at some pictures of why I love Wisconsin. I even love it more than Canada, although I wasn't in Canada for long, so I can't really judge.

Firstly, there are the cheese houses. I love cheese, and Wisconsin undoubtedly has the best cheeses in the U.S. I went to one other cheese house, but I couldn't find the picture.

We also went to the local museum that my uncle, in whose house my parents and I were staying, volunteers. I thought it would be something like my town's museum, which is nice and interesting and your average local museum... And I was so wrong. There were dozens of buildings, all well-put together, well-displayed, and had incredible pieces with in-depth descriptions. It was amazing! I took pictures of everything, especially the old clothes. Maybe I'll make a post of some more of it sometime? But anyways it was awesome!

This is one of a whole bunch of cheesy sunset pictures I took. They're all vaguely pretty and cheesy, and not really that good. But I took them off the roof of my uncle's house, and being up there was one of the most relaxing parts of vacationing in Wisconsin. I always end up on the roofs of buildings, which is so weird since I'm terribly afraid of heights.

Also, Canada was intense and exciting in its own ways! I loved seeing the little maple leaf on the McDonald's arches, and hearing people say "eh". The real purpose of going up to Canada, though, was to collect amethysts. I collected the crap out of those minerals! Haha but no seriously I really did. At the first mine we went to, it started raining. I collected amethysts in the pouring Canadian rain. Don't even try to tell me that your life is as epic as mine.

Anywho, this vacation was actually a long time ago, I was just too lazy to update. Other things have happened since then! Exciting things! I finished sewing the dress I designed, and it looks amazing. I haven't worn it yet but I have a place to wear it to, and I'm happy. Also I suddenly became the owner of a boyfriend? Weird how that happens. It's something that never would have occurred if it hadn't been summer. He said he wanted to date me, and I decided I'd let him. However, I do actually like him, it wasn't TOTALLY random.

Just some closing thoughts... I'm not ready for school to start. At all. I adore summer. Also, this year I'm hoping to get good grades. I also wanna practice french horn and piano more, and get better at sleeping.

I'm Still Listening to Bluegrass

Today (technically yesterday, because, again, it's after midnight), I made my mom take me to the Bargain Box in our town so I could drop off clothes and such with her. However, I was really trying to 1. procrastinate working on that dress I'm designing/sewing and 2. see if there were any awesome clothes that old people have left behind for me to miraculously unearth. And I was successful!
I'll upload pictures later, sometime, hopefully, maybe. My favorites would have to be this pink.. Thing. It's like a blouse of some sort? I have no idea. It's indescribable, truly, but I'll attempt. It's pale pink with an embroidery texture thing going on, and it's slightly shiny and made out of some mystery synthetic materials. I honestly can't tell what decade it could have been from. My other favorite was an unassuming pale blue skirt that I picked up just because I like skirts. It's slightly stretchy and A LOT shorter than I thought it would be, but I super love it. Anywho, those were my favorites, but I got a couple of other things.
Also, in going there for selfish reasons, I also picked up a volunteer job! Which I'm actually kind of stoked about, since I don't have a real person job. Also, the library doesn't take volunteers. *sigh* But yeah, the lady said she'd call me if she needed help, and since she won't pay me I can take whatever clothes I like. Not gonna lie, this sounds like a pretty good deal for me.

I promise that I'll have something interesting to say later! And probably pictures! :)

Photo Barf Blehhh

So these are some of the pictures Meghan and I took of each other yesterday! Or rather, two days ago, since it's past midnight. I didn't upload any of the really bad ones, however, neither of us are particularly skilled with a camera. Sorry.

We were going for a "mystical good fairies playing in the gardens/basements of pretty places" and I'd say we sort of achieved it. However, I've worn the same outfit that my friend Meghan (with the red hair) is wearing to go places, minus the petticoat, so I guess it's not TOO fairy-ish.

Anywho, I don't have too much to say, because I'm super tired, so I'll wrap this up. All of the clothes are mine, and all of the pictures were taken at my house by either Meghan or me. I already credited my clothes in my last post, but I added some pink socks that I found in my room and some fake pearl necklaces from a secondhand store. Meghan's clothes - Dress: JC Penney's, sweater/cardigan thing: Vanity maybe? I'm not sure. Pearls (fake) and shoes: La-Dee-Da, petticoat: my mom made it.

I Have Been Listening to Bluegrass for Three Days

I actually looked super cute today, so I thought I'd share. I didn't really have much to do today, or really anything to wear a dress for, so I made my own reason. My dear friend Meghan (and now my sister-in-law! woo!) came over, we wore pretty, mildly fairy-ish outfits and took pictures of each other. I'll upload some of those pics later, I'm too lazy right now.My face. The camera flash made everything look really shiny, but, like, in a good way. I guess? Haha

Those are my new favorite pair of boots, and OMG I wish you could see them in better detail. They are just so cool. Plus the chunky heel makes them pretty comfortable.I couldn't resist another picture of these beautiful shoes! (Also a wonderful picture of how messy my room is. If you have particularly good eyes, you'll notice a Yu-Gi-Oh card.) Everything about them should be kind of ugly, but it all comes together to make... this. And it's awesome. They remind me of like, some misguided girl wandering around small town rural America, asking a ruggedly handsome man on a motorcycle for a ride, and leaving home on a chopper to go to L.A. or something like that. Not that *cough cough* I would ever think of such things.

Seriously, though, I have a (very cute) guy friend who listens to bluegrass pretty much all the time. I really enjoy it whenever we listen to it, so being the awesome person that I am, I made a bluegrass radio station on my Pandora. Some of it is very cheesy and silly, but a lot of it is super cool. The violin playing is intense! It makes me wish that I still played it. Anywho, my favorite song by far is "Jolene" by Rhonda Vincent And The Rage. Mucho bueno.

Oh I suppose I'm supposed to say where I got my clothes now? Cardigan: Thrift/vintage store called La-Dee-Da; Dress: some other secondhand store; Tank top: Maurices; Tights: found them in my dresser.. Boots: La-Dee-Da

My Mom Swears in German

Today, I realized that I have approximately one week, starting today which is pretty much over, to design, cut, and sew a dress. Fortunately the dress I had in mind wasn't terribly complicated, although I've never designed a top that was so structured. Pictures woo!

It's not terribly complex, or anything, but you get the idea. It's a V-neck sleeveless sundress with a stuctured top and partially fitted A-line skirt. (Look at me using fancy words like I know what I'm talking about.)

I do all of my patterns on muslin first. (cough cough I totally didn't learn about that from watching Project Runway cough cough)

I promise I'm not actually licking it. It just totally looks like I am. Also, my face looks a bit weird, so ignore that part.

Anywho, let's hope I get that bad boy done pretty soon! So here's what's on my mind right now. There's this thing called Jerusalem Syndrome. It's where people go and visit Jerusalem and like, lose their marbles. They put on togas, babble in tongues, preach the gospel, pretend to be the Messiah and whatnot. It afflicts people of various religious backgrounds and cultures. To quote the Wikipedia (always a reliable source haha) article: "The Jerusalem syndrome is a group of mental phenomena involving the presence of either religiously themed obsessive ideas, delusions or other psychosis-like experiences that are triggered by a visit to the city of Jerusalem... a person who seems previously stable and devoid of any signs of pschyopathology becomes psychotic after arriving in Jerusalem."

Doesn't it make you wanna flip your lid?? Haha that was probably insensitive or something somehow.

Ok, so the article does go on to dispute the possible validity of Jerusalem syndrome being a specific mania particular only to Jerusalem, and the syndrome as a whole, but still. How whack is it that a city could cause such hysteria? If you're the curious type, I completely suggest perusing that Wikipedia article a bit.

P.s. My mom does swear in German sometimes. It's kind of funny, that's really the only German she knows.

I Know You Want to Look at My Feet

So, I was talking to my dad about some of the fashion blogs I read, and why I like them. I honestly have no idea why he was with me while I was reading fashion blogs, but anywho, we were talking, and he told me that I should do a fashion blog. I played it all cool, like, Oh yeah, pshh I guess I've never really thought about it except like all the time and I wish I could do that do you think I'd be able to I mean yeah that's a neat idea. But seriously. When your DAD says you should make a fashion blog, it makes you think.

Not that I would. I live in a rural Midwest town. Anything fashion-wise gets to my town about two years late. My dad, being the funny person that he is, suggested I call it "Fashion Isolation." It's fitting. But still, I dunno. I might edge towards fashion-y with nerdy tidbits and boy rantings at normal intervals.

Anywho, picture time! Just because. :)

Sorry for the funny curled-up toes. I wasn't really prepared for when the butterfly opened it's wings... So my toes were in this strange position.

These are the shoes that I love and that my mother hates. Honestly, they're a bit tacky, but still. Who doesn't love red patent-leather five inch heels with a platform? Oh, right, my mother. That's who.

You know I actually have a list of things I want to do this summer? I'm just that cool. Hopefully I get around to doing it! Everyone always has this idealized version of the summer, eating pizza with friends, cruising around late at night for no reason, sleeping in, going to the pool, getting tan, doing awesomely adventuresome things, that sort of stuff. You insist to your best friend that "This will be the best summer, I swear!" and you vow to make plans and do stuff and just cause trouble in general. You smile and have a pinky promise that you'll be super cool and epic this summer and meet a boy and blah blah blah. But basically, if you're me, you spend a lot of time doing stuff for your parents, working on geology related projects (I have stories for later), reading books, and all around not having opportunities to hang out because your friends are working or on vacation, or you're busy or out of town.

This is what summer looks like to me. :) I'm still hoping for bonfires and picnics with my friends, and summer camps crushing on boys.

Kashmir

Due to the fact that I have exactly zero readers (after how long have I been doing this?) I don't feel too guilty about not posting lately. However some major developments have ocurred, and since I wouldn't want you non-existant readers to feel left out, I'll update you.

1. One of my best friends started dating the guy I really liked.
2. I saw Les Miserables! Like, the Broadway performance. Oh, my goodness, it was seriously mind-blowing.
3. Summer has started! Lykk zomg lawlz!!1!
4. My brother Hunter got married!

Obviously, if these are the only important things in my life, I am sorely lacking in adventure and excitement. Which is true. I AM lacking in adventure and excitement. But it's only because I'm trying to behave myself and be a good kid, that sort of nonsense.
Now, if I ignored the whole Congressman Weiner scandal, I would be refusing an amazing opportunity. As such, I feel like I should enlighten you on all the terrible puns my family and I have come up with. The story about Weiner just keeps getting longer and longer! Longer and harder to believe. He might have to pull out of the public eye for a while. Do you think he'll have electile-dysfunction now? After all, the media was pretty hard on him.
That's all for now! (I truly am sorry about those inappopriate puns, it's just too hard to resist.)

I Wish You Were My Math Book

I wish you were my math book so I could slam you down on the table and do you all night long. Haha! I've been on a nerdy pick up line kick for the last couple of months. I once had an entire mildly racy text conversation using only Pokemon moves. Yeah. That's how cool I am. The boy I was texting? Logan, of course!
It turns out he had a girlfriend. Had, of course... that word is in the past tense for a very good reason. Now, I can't claim that I was the one who caused the break-up, because I wasn't. His girlfriend broke up with him sort of arbitrarily, and I am the sweet friend who's there for him while he picks up the pieces of his shattered heart. (Don't begrudge me my melodramatic tendencies, I'm ill. I can do what I want.)
Anyways, enough crush ramblings. It's time to make a confession. Truly, honestly, in my very heart of very hearts, deep down in my soul, I've always wanted to have a fashion blog. Don't laugh! (I'm addressing imaginary readers here, but whatever.) Clothes aren't just clothes to me, it's like putting on a whole new personality when I get tired of my old one. It's like subtle social commentary for the highly observant. Clothes, style, and fashion all represents not just the individual but also society as a whole, whether or not you think you're rebelling against the current norm or instead, enforcing it. It all ends up as just part of a larger idea, the ideas that are permeating the general public and those who think themselves beyond the general public. Clothes are an art form for the aesthetically inclined, architecture for your body, sculptures that you can wear.
Unfortunately, I have little to no access to so-called "high fashion" except through the interwebz, I have poor technology skills and also very little patience for uploading photos, and a tendency to misplace my family's good digital camera.
On a different note, I've started reading Hemingway. I've started with "A Movable Feast" and I fully intend to read the rest of the books we've had collecting dust in our basement for quite some time. I notice that often when reading a particularly influential author's works, I find myself emulating their language and/or writing style slightly, so I apologize for any supernaturally long sentences. I'll get over it soon enough, I'm just very impressionable and I read too much. :P
But actually, I have science to back up that whole emulation of writing styles and whatnot. It turns out, people who have similar speaking styles and subconscious sentence structure tend to have better relationships. I'm not sure if they started out speaking similarly or if two people will speak more like the other person they're with over time, but the latter holds true even if they didn't have similar speech patterns in the beginning. The article I read about this went on to talk about how when a person gets into a book, the person will sometimes alter their speech or writing slightly to match the author's style. I wish I had a link to that article, but I don't, and I can't even remember on what website I read it. Anyways, I thought it was interesting!
A couple more nerdy inappropriate things: I wish I was your derivitave so I could lie tangent to your curves. Subdication leads to orogeny, let's go make the bedrock.
Oh, and speaking of pick-up lines and such, today an old man came up to me as my father and I were leaving the drugstore. He says to me, "So is this how blondes have more fun?" We live in a small town, so it's not entirely strange for an old person to start talking to me. I laugh in my desecrated sore throat type of way, and say "You bet!"
And as I was throwing away some trash he says, "I have one more question." "Yes?" "What do you call a pretty blonde girl?" I of course, don't know, and say as much. "You!" he replies enthusiastically. It made me smile.
I'm lazy and will possibly post pictures later!

Good Behaviour

This weekend, I went to a K-State band clinic. It was super awesome and amazing! And guess who was there? If you guessed Logan, the really cute guy I was talking to at State KMEA Honor Band tryouts, you would be right! And just to make it sound suggestive, we stayed at the same hotel. I invited him to my room. *GASP* OH MY hahaha just to hang out, and there were other people there. But still. We also snuck away and skipped the entire first concert since we didn't have to play until the last one. We went to Aggieville (basically the downtown part for college kids) and totally bought fake mustaches. We wore them walking all the way back to our concert venue place and it was, for lack of a better adjective, stellar.
Anywho, Logan is officially my new crush, for anyone who cares. And yes, that means I've actually broken up with my old boyfriend who I wasn't really allowed to see in the first place. It's surprisingly difficult... But it's ok, I suppose. We're still pretty close friends.
So I guess that's my big news. I have a picture of both of us in our mustaches but it's a very bad picture of me, so I probably won't post it. Also, I bought some mind-bogglingly wonderful heels, which I will definitely post pictures of soon.
Well, that's everything! I will leave you with some cheesy, nerdy, mildly inappropriate jokes: I'm like helicase, baby, I can unzip your jeans! I'll increase YOUR entropy, if you get my meaning. I've got a high specific heat, so once I get going, I'm hard to stop. (Now for the geologists...) I can fossilize YOUR wood *wink wink.* I'm a geologist, I make my own schedules! ...Or should I say, time periods?

Bad Romance

I realize that the last... About four posts have had songs as titles. It's ok, you can deal with another one. Actually I sort of happen to love Lady Gaga, like, intensely, and this song is stuck in my head, so it's perfect.

Today was a snow day! Woo! Which means I found time to post... Which, in retrospect, doesn't really matter, since no one reads my blog. *sigh.* However, lots of things have happened and I'm even taking the time to upload pictures! Hooray exciting woot!

So, recently I went to District KMEA Honor Band, and I was third chair French Horn. Since I'm a sophomore, I got to try out for State! We did that this last weekend. I was so nervous. Not to mention I think I'd died and gone to band nerd heaven filled with cute French Horn playing boys. Mmm. :) Heehee I adore cute band nerd boys. Oh, and one of my friends from band camp was there, along with her extraordinarily adorable brother. I got his number. I suppose I shouldn't really be hitting on boys, considering I'm still sort of with my boyfriend that I'm not allowed to see. Anywho, back onto the actual music part of this whole shindig... I was the tenth French Horn-ist to audition. I was freaking out because I was so soon, but actually, the line moved really slowly so it was perfect. When it was finally my turn in the audition room I was shaking so hard I could barely arrange my music. However, I didn't fail horribly and utterly, and I'm totally proud of myself. I don't actually think I'll make it in this year, but I suppose I'll find out on Wednesday!

Also, Forensics is starting up again. You know, competitive speech. It's another one of those nerd-tastic events that I thoroughly enjoy. I was going to do track this year too, but... I'm having terrible insomnia. There's a whole week in November that I pretty much can't remember due to sleep deprivation. And then I started hallucinating and at that point I finally fell asleep from exhaustion. Advil PM only works if I haven't taken it in a long time, and then I can only use it for about three nights until the normal dose doesn't work. I hate making excuses and such, but I really can't do sports without any sleep. I tried that my freshman year and I was miserable and passed out a lot and stuff. So yeah. Probably no track. But yay for speech!

Anywho, I finally have pictures I wanna post...

That would be Hunter (the father of that adorable baby who is also my nephew), Liam, and me, nom-ing on Liam's head.

This would also be Hunter, making his sassy face and posing for me. I did the hair braiding and added the little clippy just to make sure he was as cute as possible.

And also, some lovely insomnia related pictures, just out of boredom...

Ok, so there were going to be multiple images, but technology hates me. And also I guess I formatted this incorrectly but I think I'll fix it some other day (Hint: this means it will never be fixed).

But yeah, for all of you nonexistant readers of my blog who have insomnia, I feel your pain. This last picture is just from Google Images after typing in "why can't I sleep?" I enjoyed it. I guess I never made a New Year's post, either, so Happy New Year everyone!

Crimson and Clover

Sorry about the lack of posting lately, the computer I use won't actually let me log onto this website. I have some issues with technology.
So, that boy that I liked? Yeah he became my boyfriend. Notice how that's past tense... We're not allowed to date anymore. My parents don't like him. I still do. It makes things difficult. He still likes me too, at least, so we're pretty good friends. We're just like awkwardly halfway together because we don't want to be apart but we can't be together.
I have terrible problems with Algebra II and I don't know why. I'm not even that bad at math, I just hate it with a passion.
My nephew is four months old! He's so cute. Except that he tried to vomit on me, and that was pretty gross.
I NEED TO SEE THE NEW HARRY POTTER MOVIE. This is not just a passing whim, it is an honest to God necessity. Fortunately I've read all the books more than once so it's not like somebody could spoil it.
Again, technology is conspiring against me, and the laptop I'm using doesn't work unless you hold the top left corner of the screen. I'll try to go to the library or something sometime so that I could actually put up pictures or do something useful. Also, my hair is blonde again.
Ta-ta!

Mr. Jack

School is bleh. I have an 83% in Algebra II which isn't bad but it's practically failing when you think about my family's standards. Also being volleyball manager is not really my cup of tea.
But so that you don't think I'm completely negative, I have good news! This boy, that I've been thinking about, that I like... He likes me too! Yay! And also, if you remember my "ideal guy" post, this boy is so close to being everything on that list that it's kind of frightening. In fact, he's so different from other guys I've been with or almost been with that it makes me nervous. But in a good way.
My brother is currently staring over my shoulder as I type this, and it's pretty awkward. Fortunately, his vision is so bad that he can't actually read this. He has to go back to college soon and I'm using his laptop so he has sort of a vested interested in making sure I get done typing soon.
I found my old Sailor Moon movies! They just make me so happy. I was watching them last night with a friend and we decided that we're going to be Sailor Scouts for Halloween, and we're going to make one of our guy friends be the Tuxedo Mask.
Overall I'm just super happy. :)

I'm No Superman

Insomnia has been laughing at my sanity lately. Not really, but the more tired I get, the loopier I am. It makes school difficult.
Also, we have a new English teacher at school. She's really funny and I enjoy her and for some reason she reminds me of Isabel from Hipster Musings? (which should be a link but again I'm not cool enough for that) only she's older and more teachery and doesn't always listen to angsty music and stuff. Basically, she isn't anything like Isabel but for some reason I always think of her anyways.
And, I don't want to wear out the subject, buuuuut the guy I have a crush on totally likes me back. He hasn't said so, but other people have told me so, and uhm he definitely acts as though he does. He buys me an Amp almost every morning because he knows I crave caffeine constantly and that I enjoy Amp. Plus, he's an amazing artist, and he drew me a really cool picture. That made me happy. :)
This is gonna be a short post becuase I have a piano lesson in approximately ten minutes and I don't really want to add pictures or type anything actually meaningful. So, there you have it.

Feelin' Groovy

So, about this boy that I like. I think he may like me back. But unfortunately, due to years of social ineptitude and a general inexperience in actual relationships, I have no idea how to judge these things. Also, I'm such a pansy that I refuse to ask him out. At least, not yet. Plus, it's only the second week of school. I don't wanna freak him out. He's pretty quiet and shy.

I have a mildy embarassing/cute story about him, actually. In spanish class, which is third hour, we had to stand in two lines and converse with the person across from us, and then the line would move down one person. It just so turned out that he was in the line across from me, so we were partners eventually. Anywho, once we got done with our Spanish speaking, I told him I liked his bracelet-y thingy. He said thanks, and I stepped forward to look at it and asked if it was stretchy, and he said yes, and I asked if I could try it on and he said no! I was a little taken aback, but I just sort of moved on anyways, talking to him and other people to make it seem like I wasn't disappointed.

This is where the story gets cute. We have Algebra II last hour together, and he, Darbi (a friend of mine), and I sit in the front row. My teacher told us to scootch close and work together, which made me pretty happy. I'm all hunched over my textbook because I have bad vision and I also was trying to figure out what the crap I was supposed to do, and I see the bracelet plopped onto my desk. I swear, my face like lights up and I'm all, "Ohhhhhhhhhh thank you!" Then I promptly slide it onto my wrist. Not wanting to be a creeper, I take it off and offer it back to him, but he shakes his head. So I get to keep it!

This post wasn't supposed to be entirely about my little crush but I think it might end up being that way. It's so strange, sometimes he acts all cutely shy and enamored and sometimes he doesn't. I forgot to wear the bracelet the day after he gave it to me, then the next day I wore it. That day I was in Spanish and I told the girl next to me that the assignment was kicking my butt. From a little ways away, he says, "If you sit by me, I'll help you," and then he gives me this little smile! Being a major girly-girl, I'm just like, "Ok!!!" :D :D Subtlety is not my strong point. But he is so shy I don't know if he realizes quite how into him I am. He gives me these looks and smiles and does these cute little things and then sometimes he doesn't. Whatever, it's not like I care (I do pretty much care).

THIS IS WEAR RANDOM CRUSH RAMBLING ENDS. I have been watching football. I spent my day today, which by the way is the only day I haven't had homework or some kind of lesson or both, watching football, and then I came home and I'm currently watching more football. But it's understandable, because the Packers are playing. I freaking love the Green Bay Packers. Plus they're even beating Indiana, wooo!

Here's a picture of me almost right after my hair was dyed. I'm the one with the purple-ish hair and the red glittery lips. My friend is Meghan, and she's practically my sister. She's my brother's girlfriend's younger sister.



Pretty awesome huh? The picture is slightly blurry, but not bad. And yes, my skin is freakishly pale. It's just how I am, I don't actually avoid the sunlight. I would try giving you some more photos, because Meghan and I had a "high fashion" photoshoot, but lately technology has been malfunctioning around me, so I'll leave it at this.

Encantada, Jesus.

I'm drinking a cup of tea, sitting in front of the computer screen in all of my purple-haired glory. My hair is now purple. I didn't even plan this.
A couple of things have happened recently. School started, I met a cute boy that I've barely talked to, my nephew needed surgery, I wrote a short story which I will share with you later, I dyed my hair purple, and I cleaned the entire bathroom. Fortunately, my nephew is doing well and should be recovering. I had to clean the entire bathroom tonight, and it was disgusting. Cleaning the bathroom wasn't even "punishment" for dyeing my hair purple, it's just what my mom had planned for my Saturday, I guess. My mom isn't a fan of coloring hair on the best of days, and she detests the purple. It's more of a purpleish red, and it's kind of pretty, but she hates it.
I'm not even in the two classes I really wanted to be in this year. I don't have art or Kansas History. I don't like history but I need to get that stupid class out of the way.
Insomnia is killer. These last two nights I've been doing ok on the sleep thing, but other times I've either been not sleeping or having horrible nightmares. The short story I wrote is actually based on one of my nightmares.
You know what makes me really mad? All of my favorite boys are going to college or the marines or whatever. There were a whole bunch of cute senior boys last year, one of whom even told me that he like me. One of my best guy friends is going into the marines. My older brother Hunter (the father), is going to college, and my other older brother Cameron is already there. A guy who is my brother of sorts in that he's Hunter's girlfriend's brother and pretty close to me has decided to go to college this year. Even some of my band camp boys are going to the army or the marines or college! But, I suppose everyone needs to move on with their lives.
My only consolation is that there's a cute new boy this year and he's a junior (only one grade ahead of me!). We even have a ton of classes together, including Bio II and Spanish and some others. He's sooooo quiet, though, it's hard to tell what he's thinking. However, he does appear to be an amazing artist and that makes me really happy. Also his hair is really adorable and I freaking love guys with awesome hair.

Like Sims, Only Real Life

You know how every girl seems to have this fantasy of growing up, finding that one perfect guy, getting married, maybe having some children and some pets and a job that she really likes or perhaps her husband has a well-paying job so she can just relax and pursue her interests? I never had that dream. And yes I also realize that was an incredibly long sentence. But, honestly speaking, I have never really thought about that "perfect guy." I'm sure every girl thinks about it a little bit, and I have too, and I realize that this has nothing to do with anything, but here goes. My perfect guy.

My ideal man... We'll start with physical appearance. I'd want him to be taller than me, but not a whole bunch. Maybe about three to five inches. He should either be heroin-chic skinny or slightly muscular. He should have longish hair, that's perfectly floppy, whether it's straight or curly. Every time he smiles his entire face ought to light up as though he's absolutely thrilled to see me. He also should not be disgustingly hairy (if he can pass it off as endearing I suppose it's ok). He can have face stubble though. But he is definitely not allowed to have that pathetic little goatee sort of thing that every guy in my school seemed to be trying to grow last year. I don't care too much about his clothes... Nerd jeans are sort of endearing, or he could be wearing those perfectly-fitting-yet-still-baggy jeans that are so hot. The only thing I can't stand is when his pants are ripped to shreds for no reason. Hopefully he has a couple of cute hoodies and he lets me wear one. Band tees, some casual button downs, maybe some slim fit t-shirts. Wears a belt occasionally, doesn't match his shoes. He canNOT wear tennis shoes/athletic shoes all the time! It pisses me off even though there is no legitimate reason for it to make me so mad!

This fantasy boy needs to have good taste in music. It doesn't have to be the same as mine, although there should be some overlap so we can sit in the dark and hold hands and just listen to music. Actually it would be really hard for him to have good taste in music and not listen to something I listen to, because I just know a lot of music. I really hope that didn't sound pretentious... Music is a biggy. No music, no boy. He will be able to play an instrument, might be in band, or even like A BAND, and is working on either guitar/bass/drums/harmonica, perhaps even banjo. He has this amazing voice, not necessarily a good singing voice, but when he whispers cute little nothings in my ear it gives me chills. He needs to know what I'm talking about when I reference certain classical pieces, and he should have a good understanding of the 90's grunge scene even though I don't.

My dream guy needs to be intelligent, but I'm not saying he has to be more intelligent than me. I'm insecure enough that I like being smarter. It's not a good thing, but still, it happens. He should read, but he doesn't have to read as obsessively as I do. Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, and the Eragon series are a necessity, though, and hopefully he digs the classics too. He watches Star Wars, and uses mildly inappropriate pick-up lines, but only when he's joking and only to me. He watches anime, but not so much that I feel bad that I don't know more about it, and sometimes he presents me with new shows. He reads webcomics. We laugh at inside jokes together. He's a dreamer, and a believer, an optimist, and all the happy things I wish I could be. My parents don't have to like him, although my guy will respect them even when I don't. He gets along with my siblings. He lets me be alone sometimes, but he knows when I really need someone even if I won't say it. I don't get jealous; he shouldn't either. He isn't clingy.

He should be funnier than I am, and nicer and more sociable. He will have one really good friend but a larger group of slightly more casual friends that I mostly like. He will get my slightly cynical sense of humor and watch Nightmare Before Christmas with me more than once. My guy would laugh at my that's-what-she-said jokes and all manners of inappropriate sex jokes, and he won't berate me for my catty comments on different promiscuous girls in my school. He will let me make marginally uncalled-for jokes about hipsters and even make some of his own. Every once in a while he will take me to events or places that require me to dress up just because he knows I like excuses to wear dresses and high heels and lipstick. He's the kind of guy who never really thought about going to prom at all but took me anyways because he knows how happy it would make me. He would probably wear converse with his tux, and look amazing.

And now, all closing thoughts on my supposed perfect guy. He needs to keep his nails clean, and if his feet smell bad he should at least do something about it. If he has ever shaved his legs or if he does shave his legs, that's ok. Absolutely no crack, smack, or meth should ever be done by this boy. If he smokes weed, then that's acceptable, as long as it isn't very often and not around me. If he has done LSD or ecstasy that's whatever as long is it doesn't become a habit and he doesn't do it ever when he's over twenty-five. I don't know why twenty-five is the cut off age, it just is. Actually, no drugs are allowed if we're in high school. It's going to sound weird coming out of a fourteen year old mouth, but he needs to be able to handle his liquor. I don't want him to be drunk for some reason and come to my house crying and then throw up in my bathtub and pass out in my brother's room or something. Believe me, it happens. If he does drink, he needs to have at least reasonable taste in booze. He is not allowed to drink Pabst Blue Ribbon, a known preference of hipsters and piss-poor college students. He needs to be older than me, anywhere from two to four (or five, as I get a little bit older) years older. He needs to say what he means. Piercings are wonderful and amazing, but he needs to be able to pull them off. As for tattoos, he can have some but he isn't allowed to be completely covered in tattoos. Maybe like one or two. He should like mac n cheese and pizza rolls and spicy food. He should blow bubbles with me. And most of all, he needs to have an inborn sense of respect for everyone around him.

I guess that is my dream guy. I've never thought so intensively about it, but I suppose this pretty much sums it up. Also, I'm going to keep a diary of sorts of every song that pops into my head and starts playing it's melody whether I want it to or not. So far today it's been "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" and some song by Katy Perry but I can't remember the title. And for a while I couldn't get that one pop song that goes "All the right moves in all the right places. Yeah, we're going down," out of my head.

He's Kind of Fruity

Ok, good. I just saved you from listening to (or reading, whatever) a long spiel about why I have misgivings about blogging. But since I was going to post that rant on my blog, I figured it wasn't worth it and I just spared you a bunch of whining. :)

Amazingly, crying babies don't upset me. I mean, they upset me in the way that I'm sad because something is wrong and they're crying, but the crying itself doesn't annoy me. I think the crying doesn't get to me simply because I'm cold hearted and unfeeling, but I may be wrong. Anyways, a friend was babysitting a, what else, baby, and she was freaking out because he wouldn't stop crying. I came over and calmed the baby, somehow destroying the home owner's refrigerator lock in the process. I didn't even know they made locks for refrigerators!

School is starting soon. I hate to say it, but I can't deny the truth. I'm disappointed, though... It feels like the summer has just begun, and I regret not doing a lot of things. When the summer starts, I'm always thinking that I'll read some important books, work out, be creative, become a better person, and maybe make my face pretty, but it doesn't happen. I have, however, blown a lot of bubbles, used up some of my sidewalk chalk, drawn trippy mushrooms, had picnics on my roof-porch, gone to New Orleans, and listened to a lot of music.

Also, since school is starting, I'm going to be subjected to my usual self-deprecating thoughts in full force yet again, and insecurity will become a way of life. If this sounds depressing, it's not, really. I find it kind of funny, actually.

Even though hardly anyone reads this (I got another follower, whoo!), I'm sure you are all wondering about the title. Too bad. I'll leave you with a couple of ending thoughts:

The new English teacher better be fat and funny like the last one.
Why do guys insist on wearing short shorts?
He had the best snake bites...
I hate to compare music, but The Cure is better than the Smiths.
It was really freaking hot today.
I'm watching my language.
I want to watch the Boondock Saints again.